Overheard at the Birthday Party


Because I have no filter I said these things at an eight year old’s Birthday Party. I was only there for 90 minutes. 90 long minutes.

To the Hostess:

I didn’t recognize you without wine.

To the Catholic Attorney, after she told me she’d gone to a private all girls high school:

When you got to college did you just flip your skirt up over your head, or what?

To the Dad who suggested that I need not play tennis four days a week:

Uh, yeah because my husband always dreamed of a fat and grumpy wife.

To the women who were encouraging me to go to a tittie bar with my husband:

Nothing, I was struck dumb. Still am.

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8 responses to “Overheard at the Birthday Party”

  1. annie says:

    A tittie bar? Seriously? I went one time with my late husband. It was our joint “stag” party. We had to drag him though because he thought those places where dirty and the women – um – questionable in terms of cleanliness. Anyway, what is the purpose of going to a place like that with one’s husband? Spice things up? I am more creative than that.

  2. PunditMom says:

    ;O You’re just brave! That stuff goes through my head all the time!

  3. Most tittie bars are depressing. I’ve been to ones in Vegas, in LA, in Austin, and unless you’re really good at divorcing reality, your lap dance is going to turn into a discussion of how Kandi’s c-Section went.

  4. Oh, my. You have a much more interesting social life than I do. Well, the 8 year-olds you know certainly do, anyway.

  5. WillibaldoEa says:

    You, my friend, are one classy lady. And to top it off, you attend some very classy parties. :)

  6. sam says:

    My admiration for you grows with each utterance.

  7. Damn, how did I miss that party?

  8. Leah says:

    I hear ya! I’m always embarrassing my husband at parties…the things that can come out of your mouth! Well, to be honest, I just don’t care enough to reign myself in sometimes. But I’m getting a great laugh out of what comes out of someone’s mouth for a change!

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