Monthly Archives: August 2009

Alexander lost a tooth Friday night. He was sleeping over at a friend’s house so he brought the tooth back home in a plastic bag and put it under his pillow Saturday night.

If his parents didn’t suck, Sunday would have been a great morning. I thought my husband had it covered, he assumed I did.

Instead, my boy was a little out of sorts Sunday morning, and as I was hugging him, I heard the crinkle of plastic in his pajama pocket.

“Oh Alexander, did The Tooth Fairy forget to come?” I asked him, horrified.

Alexander did this thing with his cheeks where he sucks them in a little and tries to keep from showing any real emotion. I wanted him to cry so we could fix it, but he tried to hard to keep from showing his disappointment that it about killed me. He nodded and crawled into my lap for a snuggle.

“I’m so sorry Alexander, Mommy forgot to text the Tooth Fairy. I’ll let her know now, and I’m sure she’ll get to you tonight.” I assured him.

At some point during the day yesterday the Tooth Fairy came and left a note that read:

Dear Alexander,

Your Mom just texted me and told me that you’d lost a tooth. I use them to build my castle and I could really use a shiny white one for my chimney so I came right away.

Thank you for sharing your tooth with me.

Love,
The Tooth Fairy

I took the tooth, and stuck that under his pillow.

My husband was upset with me. “Don’t you know he wanted to wake up to that?” He asked me.

“I was trying to salvage today, I wasn’t worried about tomorrow.” I replied. “You blew it too.” (I’m not above finger pointing when necessary).

“He wasn’t upset that the Tooth Fairy forgot. He was upset because he’s starting to not believe.” and then he looked for something on the ceiling, he does that a lot, but I’m not sure what it could have been.

Alexander is okay today, but how do I ask him if he believes?

I was going to give you a Friday Confession, but today ABC News printed a bit of my interview with them. Folks are yammering about how the Bebe Gluton doll is somehow dangerous for young girls. I’ve got a thunk on the head for them.

I’m not going to discuss the merits of breastfeeding. I’ll let the American Academy of Pediatrics do the talking. Not every baby is easily breastfed, I had two kids, one nursed, one didn’t. I’ll talk about why at a later date.

Here’s the issue, and it’s a big issue. Breastfeeding is not sexual. Some pseudo parenting expert out of New Jersey wrote a little column wherein he he made the leap from a breastfeeding doll to “Bebe Limp – The male doll who experiences erectile dysfunction“.

I’m a little concerned that anyone would take this seriously. Sadly Fox quoted this angry man.

My ongoing problem with the internet is the low barrier to entry. In 392 words Erik Ruhalter managed equate breastfeeding with erections, alcoholism, shotguns and rooftops.

Lest we take him too seriously, I’ve counted a few things.

392 words
seven exclamation points !!!!!!!
ten question marks ?????????? Including the title
four links to his super dee duper parenting book

I’m sure Erik is just the sort of parenting expert I’d call.

******
UPDATE: 2.25pm Erik has written an apology, he’s also written a book. Anyone big enough to stand up and admit a mistake in public deserves to sell a few books. Go say hi before the poor dear rocks in the corner sucking his thumb.

Recently I got into a little to do on twitter with Jason Falls. If you don’t know Jason, you should. Jason is often on twitter, and almost always with a kind word.

Sadly there is an assertion online, and in person that obese people are somehow not to blame for their obesity. I understand that it’s painful for someone to admit that they’ve done harm to their own body, but if we’re busy blaming pituitary glands and bum thyroids, we’re doomed to a life of morbid obesity and an early grave.

I have a thyroid disorder. For ten years I’ve had an out of control thyroid due to Hashimotos Thyroiditis. The most weight I’ve gained? Six pounds. I am told that is typical.

Fighting fat is a battle worth having. Diets suck, when you’re dieting all you do is think of food. Exercise is hard, moderation is difficult, but since when is life supposed to be easy? Are no struggles worth having?

I have friends with weight problems and it would be cruel for me to pretend like it’s not a problem. I am not a skinny woman. I don’t strive to be a size 4. I’m a curvy adult woman with a little flab and a dose of goo, but I feed my body with food. I love myself enough to eat a piece of fruit, organic meats and dairy items, and a lot of vegetables. I love sweets, I love dessert, but you can’t have everything. If I want ice cream there’s a shop at the corner, I walk there, I walk back. If I’m too tired to get the junk food I don’t eat it.

Having it all is a myth that kills us.

Jason thought that I was attacking fat people. Please don’t think for a moment that I don’t like you or think less of you if you’re fat. I know you’re less healthy than you could be, and underneath any sort of bravado there’s a sadness that you can’t move as well as you should. I don’t mock people or think that they’re feelings aren’t relevant.

Your feelings matter.

If you want to feel good, move your body. If you want to feel great, put food in your body. Skip anything that comes from a box. Buy food that spoils, buy it each and every day and enjoy the flavors. Taste a peach in the summertime and kale in the autumn, enjoy cake but know the ingredients and control the portion size. Dessert is not here to make you full.

The short cut to feeling good is to change your behavior.

I support your lifestyle changes. If you’re trying to get healthier I’ll walk with you, I’ll shop with you and cook with you. I will support you every step of the way. I will not pretend that buying a weight loss pill, food, package or plan will help you.

Please don’t talk to me about skinny or thin. Let’s talk health, let’s talk about enjoying our food and leaving a smaller footprint. You don’t need a 100 calorie snack pack, you need an apple. You don’t need a low carb diet, you need less processed food. Unless you’re diabetic you don’t need to eliminate sugar, you just need to watch it.

And you need to move. You need to make your children move, a lot. Your kids aren’t getting dehydrated, they don’t need a sports drink or a juice, they need water and a yard.

Your friends tell you when you have salad in your teeth. They also tell you when you’re killing yourself.

I don’t hate fat people, but the fat acceptance movement infuriates me.

If we’ve spoken in person and asked me about my husband, you’ve heard my standard rap. I married the kindest man I’ve ever met. It’s simple and it’s true. I love that he’s handsome and smart, those are really great qualities, and especially useful when making babies, but the kindness is what makes our lives together so wonderful.

Last night at dinner my daughter,  Jane,  pulled out a table topic. It said, “Would you rather have 10 siblings or be an only child?”

Jane immediately opted for ten siblings. “More kids to play with”, she explained.

Alexander (who just turned eight) would remain an only child. We asked him why he didn’t want someone to play with, “I have a Dad, right?” he asked. “Yes,” we replied.

“Then that’s all I need.” He stood firm, no argument could dissuade him.

While he’s wrong, very wrong, he’s also absolutely correct.

Because sometimes a really great Dad is all a little boy needs.

An Interview with Blog Talk Radio

I gave away Guitar Hero

I gave away Sephora Gift Bags

I gave away great outfits from I Am Beyond

I gave away gift sets from Brainy Baby

And I gave away great tees from 10 Again Clothing.

But mostly. I met talented and bright women and I was privy to some incredible conversations.

I had a chance to see the world a little differently, and for that I’m grateful.

The best parts of BlogHer will never get written about, because they defy description.