Monthly Archives: June 2010

I’m sorry, I know I’m redundant, but it’s not just me this time. This time Rebecca Woolf talks about shaving down there since… forever. This time, Daphne Brogdon says she sports the full bush. This time Maggie Mason blushes and admits to never having waxed, and never wanting to.

This is the eight hundred millionth time I’ve talked about getting waxed, but let’s be frank, it’s funny. Waxing is about the funniest thing women do.

To continue the conversation, here’s Momversation, and we’re asking what you do.

And P.S. I know it’s not a HooHah, but I’m getting tired of pervvy searches.

At nine o’clock this morning I hid a man from my husband. He stood in my kitchen sipping his coffee while the kids woke my husband up, and begged him to take them out for breakfast.

Parked in the driveway was a 2011 Jaguar XF. It took me forever to find a car with a silver/grey exterior and a light interior. Apparently we are the only people in California to want a car without a charcoal interior.

My husband was surprised and delighted. The man? He was the Jaguar salesman who got up very early on a Sunday morning to deliver a car for us.

Who wouldn’t be thrilled with an XF? The car is stunning. If it reminds you a little of the Aston Martin DB7, that’s because Ian Callum designed both cars. It’s fast and quiet, which is a wonderful combination. The sound system is much finer than the ones we left behind in our BMWs, and opening and closing the vents is a joy that defies description. I’ll put it on You Tube shortly. See the video below.

My kids will always remember the day. It was really exciting for them to give their dad such an extravagant (and well received) gift.

This evening, when we went to dinner, and the kids were hanging off of him like earrings, I just thought: Perfect. My life is perfect.

I’m married to a wonderful man, and my children have the privilege of being raised by him. This is as good as it gets.

I just am.

It’s not often that I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I’m better at this parenting gig than another woman.

Usually I hope I’m doing okay, more often I fear I am not. But today? Today looking at this video I know I’m a better mother than she is.

Watch this, and please don’t blame me if you can’t un-see it.

Some time ago my friend Cassie asked me to write a letter to my 20 year old self. Since I adore Cassie, I happily wrote one. She published it yesterday.

Everything about my life is better at forty. I don’t work as hard at people pleasing. At twenty when someone didn’t like me I was devastated. At forty when someone doesn’t like me, I’m pretty sure they’ll like someone else. For the most part I shrug my shoulders and walk away. At forty I also realize that not everyone will like the way I do business, but that’s also okay.

This is the year I say “no thank you” to almost everything. I’m not going to many conferences. I don’t really ache for a personal connection with women who don’t live in my community. I know that for many these are precious friendships, and I understand that they have value. For me, at this moment in time, I’d like to concentrate on the people nearby. I live in Los Angeles, there are about three and half million people I can meet without jumping on an airplane. I have neighbors that I should spend more time with. Girls in Tech offers me nerdy delights. I’ll be at Bloggy Boot Camp in October, because Austin is a city I’m dying to see, and because I’d follow Tiffany anywhere.

I just wonder about the wisdom of all these conferences. How much time and money am I supposed to take from my family before I give back?

I do want to connect with you, but I’m not convinced that I have to leave my family to do so. I’m thinking that this blog, facebook , Posterous and twitter should give us enough of each other.

Maybe I’m wrong? What do you think?

I haven’t written about the BP oil disaster, because it makes me cry.

I’m not saying that to be funny, cheeky or dramatic. When I think of the environmental disaster that BP has unleashed on our oceans, I start to cry. I can’t help it.

I have a love affair with the ocean. I was in my late 30′s when Jean-Michel and his amazing team from Ocean Futures Society took me underwater for the first time. That’s right, I was a beach kid. I was raised with surf and sand, but I’d never really looked at the world under the waves.

I am in love with the ocean. My children are in love with the ocean.

My children snorkel and dive into the kelp forests that surround Catalina Island, and chase schools of Garibaldi while shark families wiggle inches below us. My husband and I race to shine lights on giant lobster during night dives, and we delight in the Bluebanded Goby during the day.

My experience is that looking underwater changes the way you see the world. It changes the way we consume, how much we are willing to waste, and what we dispose of.

The oceans do not belong to man. The most we can hope for is a short invitation to visit. It is not our home.

So when I see this terrible excuse for an apology I am livid. Since BP has set YouTube up in a manner that does not allow me to embed their video on this site, I’ll go ahead and transcribe it here for you. Tony Hayward’s content is in bold, my comments are in italics:

The gulf spill is a tragedy that never should have happened. This is the sentence that comes closest to truth. This is NOT a spill. A spill is when a tanker tips over. This is a geyser undersea. This is a dramatic amount of oil that was meant to be underground.

I’m Tony Hayword. BP has taken full responsibility for cleaning up the spill in the gulf. This is patently untrue. BP has taken limited responsibility. In May they tried to blame it on the rig operator.

We’ve help organize the largest environmental response in this country’s history. Yes, you are responsible for the largest disasters in our country’s history. Remember the explosions in Texas City in 2005? Remember the spill in Alaska in 2006. I wonder why America hasn’t banned BP from it’s borders?

More than 2 million feet of boom, 30 planes, and over 1,300 boats are working to protect the shoreline. Note that the oceans are not worth protecting, only the shoreline. Why? Well, there are no news cameras in the middle of the ocean. Yet. Do not mistake BP for a company that cares one whit about the planet.

When oil reaches the shore, thousands of people are ready to clean it up. What is BP going to do when they are ill? They will be ill. Also, by the time the oil reaches the shore IT IS TOO LATE. The damage is done.

We will honor all legitimate claims and our cleanup efforts will not come at any cost to taxpayers. Bullshit. It already has. People are losing their businesses and their homes. This reduces the tax base. We lost financially already. When BP Executives file personal bankruptcy (as opposed to the moral bankruptcy they already claim) then I’ll know that I, the American taxpayer, is not footing the bill.

For those affected and your families, I’m deeply sorry. Even my eight year old knows that sometimes sorry isn’t enough. Sorry doesn’t fix things.

The gulf is home to thousands of BP employees and we all feel the impact. I don’t care about your employees until you start caring about my children’s future. They will find new jobs, perhaps in the green sector.

To all the volunteers and the strong support of the government, thank you. I thought you had this under control. You shouldn’t need help from government agencies, or were you going to reimburse us taxpayers for the valuable time you used?

We know it is our responsibility to keep you informed and do everything we can so this never happens again. If BP wasn’t allowed on American Soil or in American waters this probably wouldn’t happen again… here.

We will get this done. We will make this right. No, you won’t. You can’t. Not in this lifetime.

If you want to see what the oil looks like (remember that like an iceberg, you’re only seeing a tiny bit of it) take a look at this set on Flickr.

Remember when P&G used the winter Olympics to make me us cry?

What I didn’t realize at the time is that the Thank You Mom Campaign also included financial support for athlete’s parents. If that doesn’t make your heart melt, I don’t know what will.

Right now P&G is giving away substantial gifts ($1,000 gift cards and a video camera) that will cover or defray the cost of a reunion with mom. Here’s how you can enter to win.

Go to www.ThankYouMom.com and submit a 100-word essay describing why you would like to be reunited with your mom.

From the site:

Judges will choose 30 finalists based on the following criteria:

• Originality & Creativity of Essay — 40%
• Overall Inspiration of Quality of Essay — 25%
• Appropriateness of Essay to Contest Theme — 25%
• Appropriateness of Title to Essay — 10%

In the event of a tie during judging, the tie will be broken based on the highest score for Originality & Creativity.

During the last week of each month the 30 finalists will have their essays published and we can go to to ThankYouMom.com and cry like babies vote for the best entries. Of the thirty finalists YOUR VOTE determines who the winning 15 are. This contest runs all the way through November. Every month there are 30 new finalists. During the last week of each month there is voting, and 15 lucky kids will get reunion money so they can get together with their moms.

Originality & Creativity matter? I can give you Originality & Creativity.

How about a limerick? There once was a daughter from Cali….

Perhaps a “my mom is wackier than your mom” theme? I mean the winners will be getting video cameras, and are encouraged to share the reunion. Why not a wacky reunion?

Binary! You could write a binary essay: 01001001 00100000 01101100 01101111 01110110 01100101 00100000 01101101 01111001 00100000 01101101 01101111 01101101 00100000 01110011 01101111 00100000 01101101 01110101 01100011 01101000 (that reads: I love my mom so much). Maybe not binary, you’d use up your character limit pretty quickly.

Here’s the thing, you only get 100 words to tell P&G why you’d like to be reunited with your mom. Be creative, be splendid…. OMG be $1,000 closer to mom.

There will be 15 winners. I hope one of my readers can be one of them.

This post is sponsored by P&G