I Missed The Moment

Yesterday was a long day. I spent the school day at the Auto Show, picked the kids up, spent the afternoon with them, and then I brought Jane to school. At night.

You see, the school has evening open houses twice yearly, and the kids “go to school” for an hour at night. The kids have to wear their uniforms and attend one class (for an audience of prospective parents). Jane was furious, and did not want to attend. After explaining to her that it would be fun, and then giving her a tough luck you’re already committed to this, Jane decided to go along with the program.

We carpooled with Sophia, and I dropped the two girls off at 7pm. At 8pm I had a party to attend, so Sophia’s mom was to bring them home at 8.30 or so.

At 8.45 my phone rang. I was at the LalaWag relaunch party when Jane breathlessly called me and said:

Oh my gawd Mom the school night was so much fun. I’m actually home right now and I’m so glad I went, we were archeologists for the night and we had to pull clues out of a trashcan and….

I interrupted her told her that I was happy she had a good time, and that I’d love to hear about it when I got home. I told her I loved her, and I asked her to be good for the sitter.

When I got home at 10.45 Jane was laying awake in her bed.

“Why are you awake?” I asked her.

“I’m waiting to tell you about school,” She said. With eyes wide open she began to tell me about the evening, but I was tired. Even my bones ached.

“Honey I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean for you to stay awake this late. Go to sleep and you can tell me about it in the morning.” And I kissed her goodnight, while she tried to keep chatting.

Shhh, goodnight I whispered as I backed out of her bedroom.

I washed my face, undressed and fell into bed. I laid there, with my eyes wide open thinking I should have listened to Jane. I should have taken the three minutes and just been there to hear about her night.

When I tiptoed back into her room she was asleep. I missed the moment.

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Comments 8

  1. I bet you will miss another one. Whether it’s because of what’s going on for you, or what’s going on for her, her brother, her father … it probably (undoubtedly?) will happen again. But just knowing how important the moments are, and checking in with her after, will make a difference, and allow for the moments to keep happening. She knows how much you love her, and that you care.

  2. I can remember these moments, with my Mom. Just wanting to sit and talk to her, but she would get frustrated, thinking I was just procrastinating. I certainly don’t know Jane but I have a feeling she will ‘forgive’ you when you tell her that you regret not staying up for a bit.

    From the view on my laptop, you are a great Mom.

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  4. Oh, I’m so sorry that happened to you. The next morning I would make a point of dropping whatever I was doing to ask all about the evening.

    Do our kids realize how we agonize over things like this? Last night I had to ground my son so my daughter and I went to see the Harry Potter movie without him. I would have enjoyed it tons more if he’d been there.

  5. I hate hate hate when that happens with my kids. Your story made me teary. Hope you got a chance to sit and be with her while she slept. I do that sometimes after a really hard day with my older two (dx’d w/mood disorders) and I just need to reconnect. Thank you for your honest mom moment here!

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