I have an interesting dilemma

My daughter is now on G+. She likes the idea of the hangouts with friends and she has enjoyed some of the tech I've discovered in the stream. She'll be getting Facebook for her 13th birthday this week (it's the only gift she really wants) but I won't friend her there…. would you let your child circle you on G+?

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  1. Solutions
    1. make 2 accounts
    2. make 3rd account to be her new "internet friend" that she doesn't know is you so you can keep an eye on her without it ruining what you do and what she does..
    3. give her a book instead.
    4. um.. yup, i'd do one of those 3.

  2. +Chocka Greenfield
    1. I love you
    2. you should see the books she reads, they are shit.
    3. Both my kids know that we keep a log of their computer activity and can access it at any time. I'm the admin on her computer and it basically it keeps her from being a mean girl, one time it helped keep her off of a bad site.

  3. Im a young adult and, in my opinion unless there are things YOU post that you don't want your daughter to see, it is perfectly acceptable to be in both a circle on G+ and a friend on facebook. Its a good policy that if you don't want your parents to read it or see it, it shouldn't be on the internet. I personally have both my immediate family and most of my extended family as friends on both social networks and I know they monitor my activity but I'm responsible enough that an issue with what I'm posting has never come up. Giving her the freedom of having an account on these websites comes with responsibilities and we know future employers will look at what we post, so making sure you monitor what you say from the beginning is a good policy no matter how old you are.

  4. The reality is that this is a +18 site and your daughter shouldn't be on here. There are legal constraints re marketing and data collection that require all of us to be the age of legal consent.

  5. Yes, but my child is 24. I would have let her circle me at your daughter's age, too, though. I believe modeling behavior is a powerful teacher.

  6. I would actually only let her have a Facebook account and be in G+ if she was connected to you in both places. When I was teaching middle school, that was actually the exact advice that I gave the parents of my students!

  7. The problem is, they can make a 2nd account to hide from you anyway. So I guess it really comes down to trust…

  8. I have to say I have bigger issues with trusting G+ and FB to be doing the right things with your daughter's data. You know what you do at home and what works for you, but being online isn't at all like the context of home and keeping her birth certificate in a drawer.

  9. +jessica Bernstein there is NO WAY I'd connect myself or my husband via FB, but, again, I'm the admin on her computer. I think that's a much better option.

  10. In the Terms of Service, +Jessica Gottlieb. I wonder if it's possible to google for it… Hrm, those things can be slippery to track.

  11. Kim

    I generally agree with your every post – but I disagree with your mention of not “friending” your daughter once she’s on FB. Certainly you know your daughter best, but for me and my daughter (who is only 7), I would be too wary of creepy people on FB to not be her friend. Just my opinion. 

    • The problem with that is that I don’t use Facebook for local social stuff. Facebook is very much a part of my blog and my online community. My online community is all adults and there’s really no reason for them to have access to my child.

      I’d argue that most parents shouldn’t be connected with their children on Facebook, there’s no need for kids and adults to be sharing their social circles.

  12. Yes I would for my kids.

  13. I agree with +Samantha Dourney: If you are embarrassed for your parents or maybe grandma to know, it shouldn't be online anyway. Perhaps it could be suggested that Google Plus make a profile for children, linked to an adult profile or two (read parent or other accountable persons) that can monitor and have to approve every friend. The profile would be undiscoverable (even in conversations) to anyone not specifically sought out or a current email contact. hmmm…. Any Googlers got a comment on this?

  14. Oh God no! I didn't think of it that way, but more of a safety precaution. I don't know! That sucks. Still there should be a way if kids will be allowed that they need parental monitoring as a precaution against pervs. Tho, at her age, I would have totally faked my own adult profile and an email and all that jazz and started an account. My mother now knows the things I did on that laptop dad brought home from work, but he never will. Apparently he never even told her about the talk we had about how paying by the minute for AOL and blah blah blah and how did I find that much time to be online when it was only home when he was (which wasn't often).

  15. +Jessica Fuller aka NazzRose Again, I am the admin on my kids computer and I do check chat logs and websites pretty often. I think that with the amount of personal blogging I've done I'm a little more protective of the kids online.

  16. While you are savvy, not every parent is lucky enough to be technologically ahead of their kids. Kinda like some fresh off the boat families where the child translates for the parents (I've seen it in stores and service shops)

  17. Poor kid. My parents STILL can't use the internets; they are too terrified to get on a social network. E-mail can be a little too much for them. I've been online since I was 13; glad no one ever admin'ed me.

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