Endings

One of the things that I’ve noticed as a reader is that there are a number of books that are good, great even, until the ending and then they sort of just unravel and stop. It’s as though the author knew they needed to stop writing but didn’t quite know how.

I fear that this site has that problem. Blogging has changed and I haven’t. I was texting with a friend just a bit ago who also quit blogging recently and she said, “It sucks having gone from innovators to dinosaurs.”

Consider this my mic drop.

Blogging was my full time job for a number of years. They were good years. Years that were important in my children’s development. They were years where the kids were in school for a short number of hours a day, and not even five days a week. By being a mom blogger I was able to earn a living without ever hiring a babysitter for my kids, missing a school event, a pickup, a drop off or feeling the pressure of full time employment. I wrote every day, sometimes for multiple outlets and I learned a lot about how to write for the web (which should not be mistaken for the fine art of writing).

In 2014 and now in 2015 I have not blogged daily nor have I monetized this site. Although I have a blog I would no longer call myself a blogger as it’s not my day job.

Recently Kelby (founder of Type A Parent) asked folks on Facebook what they thought of the term Mommy Blogger. I’ve been on national TV at least a dozen times with the Chyron reading “Mommy Blogger”. It made me cringe a little but I was on TV and I was on TV as a blogger who writes about motherhood, that makes you a Mommy Blogger, or at least it did then. I have since learned to be more assertive when asking about the lower third. As of this writing Kelby’s question has 120 comments, all of them interesting. “Mommy Blogger” is a polarizing term.

I am working on a post about the term “mommy blogger.” What are your thoughts on it? This will be for possible quoting,…

Posted by Kelby Hartson Carr on Friday, April 3, 2015

If I’m not a blogger why am I keeping this site alive? As the Mom Blogging industry shifted from personal stories told by a small group of women to a large number of women promoting products I’ve moved right along with them. I created an agency that facilitates partnerships between businesses and influencers. I work to create and execute campaigns that work for everyone: brand, blogger and audience. It is possible to respect everyone in the process.

It’s time for me to concentrate on work. Blogging isn’t work anymore and since it no longer offers community, satisfaction or income it’s time to reassess how time, my most limited resource, is being spent.

Twitter changed blogging profoundly. When Facebook opened up to everyone there was even less reason to update a blog. We all want to own our content but the ease of posting something funny and fast in other places is just too much to resist.

Which isn’t to say that none of this matters anymore. It’s still important to build a universe of content for yourself if your business exists online. A website you own should be the center of that universe. We’ve seen too many things come and go to trust the most important content to anyone else. I begrudgingly leave reviews on Yelp and Trip Advisor but resist as much as possible because I hate the idea of providing content for anyone else. When I write I want to own the words.

I want to be a better marketer. What I know could fill a thimble but it’s a thimble that is very much desired and not understood by many who need it. Maybe in 2015 I’ll fill a second thimble with knowledge and expand my horizons. I like being in a position where I can help women working from home make some money. I enjoy guiding executives through murky waters and helping them hone their messages so they can reach their intended audience.

I started blogging because I was losing a friend to AIDS. I continued blogging after he died because I enjoyed the community around me. I’m quitting blogging because the kind of writing that has helped to support my family all these years is no longer in demand, because I’m not getting better as a writer and because I don’t have an awful lot left to say.

I recently spent two weeks in Europe and all I could think was, “I don’t want to share this with anyone. I’m tired of sharing my family’s stories.”

Please follow me on Facebook, Twitter or YouTube.

I might update things here once in a while but I’m not a blogger. I haven’t been for a long time. Not anymore.

Facebook Comments

  • Ellen Daniel

    I love reading your blog entries from my email, and I totalll get it. I don’t remember the last time I wr a blog post. It just is a lot of work sharing the real details of my life.

  • Mr Lady

    I’m glad for you. This will be the beginning of a good new for you. Maybe you’ll keep blogging in a new way, who knows. But this is right, it’s time, and it will be liberating. Congrats!

  • alexandra

    Sounds well thought out, and at peace with the decision. I’m glad you blogged, it’s how I met you.

  • Tom Wacker

    You may not be a blogger anymore, Jessica, but you can never un be a writer. I have never read your stuff to brush up on my parenting skills, see what is edgy and young (I am stodgy and old) or what the hot set up is for school. I am a huge fan of really solid writing and you fit that.

    Thanks for the memories.

  • Kelly Loubet

    I’ve been reading your blog since um… 2008-ish? You are what made me want to blog. And although my “mommy blog” was never the caliber of yours… I found my own way. Because of you- I pursued a career in something I was good at- social marketing. If I had never read my first “mommy blog”- here on this site- I would have never won my very first social media innovation award- which I found out Friday- I did. It’s pioneers like you, that allowed the next to find their way. You know much more than a thimble’s worth of marketing. If you’re pouring yourself into it- you’ll do even more than you already have. And I will be watching and hoping for the chance to work together- connecting the brands I work for with the talented network you’ve built. I love and admire you and I’m glad to see you blaze a new trail. xo

  • I loved your post! I think like everything else in life we all evolve and reinvent ourselves as we move through life. 20 years ago I was doing 3D animation and then I discovered the Internet and taught myself to code and became a web designer. It was cool at first, I was a rare breed and I made loads of moolah. Then like everything else, everyone was a web designer so I moved on to web project management. I did that for a while and realized it was a nightmare and it was not for me. I went back to school for Intenet Marketing. Now I manage digital content for a large company and up until recently I loved it. Then, with the blink of an eye, the org chart changed and my new manager thinks content management has little to do with marketing and strategy. I’m scratching my head wondering what to do next. Time to move on again….

    It’s just life, messy and ever-changing. I feel like a shape shifter sometimes.

    BTW I loved reading your posts about your trip!!! I can’t wait to go to Barcelona now!!! 21 days!!!

  • All good things, right? I hate seeing those who have travelled this long road with me leave, but i completely understand. Cheers!

    • I’m still around. I’ll still create content, not sure where or how but just not like this.

  • RookieHeather

    Bittersweet, endings are.

  • I want to say no, don’t go, but… yes, yes, emphatically, yes. Do what you love and what makes you feel good. But please don’t unfriend me on Facebook, because I will miss your sardonic wit.

  • I love everything you choose to share because it expands my horizons and, often, entertaining. That said, I think the space of privacy is valuable and if you choose to define that as withholding or limiting the extent of your sharing is up to you. I’ll cheer you on no matter what. It’s the person you are in our world that earned my loyalty and while that developed in-part to your sharing, it’s your character that keeps me around. Thank you for that.

  • Kenn Chaplin

    Hope I never lose track of you.

  • rajean

    I never knew why you began to blog, but I appreciate your journey and what you have brought to the community. We met on Twitter and I enjoy being your FB friend. Funny that many are going back to FB posts, because my blogging friends kept saying I needed to blog because of my FB posts – they were mini blogs. But they are work to keep active, and clearly you have other work to do. Onward.

  • Brad Waller

    Maybe you should start a blog about emotional service animals…

  • Kim

    The term “mommy blogger” has always pissed me off for the very reason of it being polarizing. Women like myself who had no kids were often ignored in favor of the mommies, especially as it pertained to monetizing and doing sponsored posts. As a married 30-something without kids I was invisible.

    Slowly, I’m seeing a shift. And, at least in my perspective, that shift is leaning back toward the personal story. Real writing with thought, emotion and depth. More than ever I am seeing women writers (moms or not) sharing real, honest stories from the heart instead of hawking yet another product. And man do I love it. It’s refreshing and the writing is actually good for a change.

    I have not known you long, but I have enjoyed your site and will be sorry to see fewer posts. But, as someone else said, you are still a writer and this is your platform. Keep writing and doing what works best for you.

    (And sorry for the novel-length comment.)

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