Sexist Boy Ears

“He wants to get his ear pierced.” My daughter nodded. “It seems a little impulsive to me,” I reply. “It’s not. He wanted to do it in New York when he visited me.” The next day I’m talking to Mr. G who logically explains that Jane had her ears pierced multiple times at 16. He throws in a handful of logic and reminds me that if he doesn’t like it, he can just take it out and the hole will eventually¬†close up. We are in the mall, at night. I …

Chopsticks, Death and Love

I’m in Monterey Park and after dropping a chopstick on the floor I grab a new one. Just one. As my hand hovers over a dumpling my friend practically shouts, “Don’t do that!” Alarmed, I drop my hand and ask, “Don’t do what?” “Never use mismatched chopsticks,” she says, “it’s bad luck.” Not being superstitious¬†I raise my chopsticks again and start to grab a dumpling when I am interrupted by an older woman at the table next to us, “We use chopsticks like that when someone is dead. It’s for …

The Longest Shabbat

I didn’t work in 2017. I know it, my family knows it, my clients learned it, and shortly my accountant and the IRS will know that in 2017 I did nothing that really looks like paid work. Sure, I partnered with a friend and worked on our Instagram channel. We even started a website. But I didn’t work. I didn’t make the commitments that keep me out of the house, stuck in the house (in my office), or emotionally unavailable. I also didn’t make any money. I don’t regret a …

Talking to Kids About Porn

Today’s New York Times features an article which asks the question, “Does Porn Hurt Kids?” The answer was a resounding, “Maybe?” I won’t argue if porn should or shouldn’t be. Porn just is. It’s always been here and it will continue to be here. The only things that are markedly different about porn now versus my childhood is that kids have unprecedented access to it and because of the short attention span of the internet it’s all been fast forwarded to “the good parts”. Magazines and sidebar images seem tame …

Solo Parenting Day 3

The house is now as dirty as my hair. I’ve sharpened my knives because Alexander requires endless amounts of fruit. He has a sweet tooth and just today ate a pint of strawberries, a pint of blueberries, half a small watermelon and then all his regular food. He just sort of sits down and inhales it all watching quizzically as I slice my hand open. I’ve decided that my cut hand is my son’s fault because I still can’t sleep. In addition to missing Mr. G I have Junior the …