Parties Articles

Last night I went to Adrienne Maloof and Charles Jourdan’s shoe launch party. She has designed a line of shoes for them and if you love high heels you’ll love this collection. They’re sky high and full of color and sparkle.

It was an interesting evening because I wanted to ask her a few questions about how she came to partner with Charles Jourdan. Did she look at the shoes in her closet and think, “these could be made better”? Did Charles Jourdan approach her? Did she have a secret sketchbook and a love of all things leather and luxe?

Before I could ask questions there was a mild freak-out. I guess her publicist wanted to know who I wrote for… um myself. And what kind of questions I’d be asking… um questions about the shoes… we were in the SHOE DEPARTMENT. Only a small number of people had been invited. I was invited, this was weird.

I finally got past the publicist. The answer was that the team at Charles Jourdan approached her. Adrienne Maloof knew that she loved shoes (don’t we all) and it was a good and logical partnership. She was a charming hostess, took a thousand pictures and had a kind word for everyone.

What stuck me driving home was how alike reality stars and mom bloggers can be. We’re both deathly afraid that our audiences will turn on us. I have no idea why many of you read this blog. I don’t know if you like me or hate me. Perhaps you have no feeling either way. I’m not asking for an answer because I’m smart enough to know that you should never ask questions that you don’t want the answer to.

Recently a bunch of traffic came to one of my posts from a private mom blogging forum. It’s one I hadn’t heard of prior and it seems to be quite new. There was some discussion about the Infantino Baby Sling post and it was all interesting. They weren’t sure what side I was on. I was unsure there was a side, it was only a discussion. When I scrolled down I read the following:

I’ll admit I didn’t click through. I can’t give JG any traffic. Even I find her to be very abrasive. I think that says a lot. But I think Shawn Ann is awesome.

Things like this used to sting. A lot. Now they entertain me a little because I don’t know who this person is and clearly she has never met me. It’s not personal. It doesn’t reflect on me so much as the author.

Can you really hate someone you’ve never met? Even if it’s someone who has absolutely zero impact on your life?

Are bloggers like Real Housewives? Should we be afraid of the community? Wait, don’t answer that.

Mr G and I were invited to a dinner party last night. When we first started dating it seemed like we were at a dinner party every week, and then something changed, maybe it’s because we all started having kids, but the dinner parties turned to potlucks and my flirty dresses became jeans and tees.

I was really happy when our friends decided to host a dinner party.

There were four couples and a few singles invited. Mr G and I were the second couple to arrive and just as we were seated Vladimir and his wife arrived. They were a lovely Russian couple (all but three of us were Russians), he promised to not talk about sex, religion or politics and promptly broke the promise. His wife muttered something about Americans not smoking or drinking so they could die very healthy. These people are my people, I knew I was going to enjoy them.

After Vlad and his wife settled in six of us made small talk. Everyone tried really hard to speak in English. As we were finishing our first glass of wine a nice American lady arrived, a little shiny faced and somewhat breathless. She was wearing the most fabulous cocktail dress and sexy heels. When our host Boris introduced her all around she smiled at Vladimir and his wife and said, “You’re the ones who took my parking spot and told me I should walk.”

At an American dinner party this is the part where it gets awkward and uncomfortable. Folks start to drink a little too much and there would be passive aggressive banter. It’s a good thing this was a predominantly Russian crowd, as one more couple came to the garden to join us for appetizers there was some banter in Russian, the hostess said, “Oh we’ll drive you back to your car when dinner is over.” and somehow the parking spot thieves apologized without ever saying, “I’m sorry” and the evening was lovely.

With a dozen overachievers (minus me) and their overachieving spawn we heard tales of 14 year old college students, 22 year old attorneys and the need for life insurance. We talked about little kids and their little problems and then big kids and their big problems. We laughed with our entire bodies and ate a magnificent meal.

There were moments where we all knew we were living an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm, but no one would admit to being Larry David. We deferred to our host who actually has been featured on Curb, and begged him to keep his shoes on.

I need more dinner parties, more cocktail dresses, more couples and less jeans.

I also need more Russians in my life. Any woman who can sip her chardonnay while lighting a cigarette and not mess up her lipstick is a woman I need to spend more time with.

Next week is a big week. I’ll be speaking at Women Create Media and then scooting on over to BlogHer.

I attened a BlogHer conference two years ago in Chicago, skipped New York in August 2010 (if you’re from NY you have to admit there’s no good reason to go there in August) and now I’m ready to give it another try in 2011.

Here are five things I will not be doing for BlogHer.

1. I will not be out after 10pm. I am not happy after 9pm and nothing is happening at parties after 10pm. Well, something is happening. People are drinking and enjoying themselves, but I’m off to BlogHer to connect with bloggers who I’m dying to meet, and to connect with marketers who I’m sure won’t be wasted in a hotel suite in the middle of the night. I plan on moderation and a good night’s sleep.

2. I will not be doing my hair or nails for the occasion. Take me as I am.  I’m a blogger who has shared her life with you. If my lack of a recent mani-pedi turns you off then it’s your issue, not mine. It’s not a beauty contest or a fashion show. It’s just a lot of women in one place. I don’t plan on smelling bad, I’m just not looking for a date so I’m going to make myself comfortable.

3. I will not be giving my business card to bloggers. If you want to reach me I’m at Jessica@JessicaGottlieb.com, you can call me at 818.486.9363 or you can text that number, either is fine, on twitter I’m @JessicaGottlieb and I’m on Google + as well. You don’t need my business card, you’ll just throw it out.

4. I will not be judging you unkindly. It’s no secret, I’m a judgy lady. I’ve got to figure out who I like and who I don’t like.  So when you have the nerve to show up to something as admittedly intimidating as BlogHer and you’re kind enough to introduce yourself and smile the judging is over. I already know I like you. Case closed.

5. Private Parties? Yes, there are quite a few of them. I was invited to some, and I’ll never be invited to others (Nikon… you never invite me… but since you don’t give away free cameras I don’t feel that bad). I’m pretty sure the private parties will be pretty good, but I’d also probably NOT attend without my own car or cab fare. 45 minutes at any party is plenty for me. If it’s super loud and we can’t hear each other anyhow why am I there?

I love meeting folks who I’ve only followed online. BlogHer is going to have 3,000 attendees this year and each of those 3,000 people only cares about him/herself so the good news is that you can come as you are and most of them will be too busy with their own insecurities to worry about yours.

Although a conference by and for women can be affirming, it’s also not particularly realistic or helpful. As much as I love supporting women in business it’s a little foolish to think that you can keep the boys out and have great success, though I know folks would argue that the boys work pretty hard at keeping the girls out. BlogHer will be fun, if you decide it will.

Here’s a snapshot of the business card I won’t be handing you.

One reason I’ve come to dislike BlogHer so much is that it signals the end of summer. I don’t like this at all.

Wednesday afternoon I had to pick Jane up from a friend’s house and Alexander begged me to let him stay home alone. We talked about what to do, how to answer the phone, when to open the gate (never), and no media. I never mentioned don’t set any fires.

Wednesday night I was supposed to be at a Pre-Oscar party, it was a good one too. My friends at Chevy won Green Car of the Year and used a fleet of Volts to drive celebrities to the Global Green Party.

I was dressed and ready to head out for the evening. I said goodnight to my daughter and went to tuck my son into bed. His bedroom stank and I couldn’t quite place the smell. “Did you fart Alexander?” I gently teased him, and when he gave me a guilty look (as opposed to a chuckle because everyone knows farts are funny) I knew something was going on.

A quick scan of the room revealed a wad of toilet tissue on his desk with holes burnt into it. Burned, as in fire.

Upon closer examination I realized that he’d used his desk lamp to burn holes in the toilet tissue. Now, you may find this odd, but about a year ago we thought we had chemical disaster when we smelled something awful coming from Alexander’s bedroom. Apparently he’d discovered the joy of melting his rubber tipped erasers onto the same desk lamp. Like the toilet tissue it was dangerous, but also to be expected from a curious nine year old boy. Right? We talked to him about the safety issue, he cried, we thought it was all done.

Wrong.

I asked him when he was playing with the lamp and the toilet tissue and his eyes turned into saucers. He just stared at me.

“Was it when you were home alone?” My voice was cracking

He slowly nodded, and I felt like the world was slipping out from under me. I could hear my mother’s voice in my head: Little kids little problems. Big kids big problems.

If we ever have a problem bigger than this I think I’ll require a trip to the emergency room.

I stood in my son’s bedroom, burnt tissue in my hand and mascara running down my cheeks, “Mis-ter GEE!” I yelled downstairs, “You need to come talk to your son.”

My husband muttered a few things, Alexander nodded. I stood crying like an idiot in my cocktail dress and Mr. G. wrapped the whole thing up with, “Just don’t be stupid.”

We nailed that one.

You might have seen some video from me this weekend featuring Jane’s Addiction or Tony Hawk. Then you might have been scratching your head wondering why Jessica is at a backyard party where Tony Hawk (and friends) are skating on a half pipe, while Jane’s Addiction performs. It did not happen because Tony Hawk sent me a handwritten invitation. I was not there because Perry Farrell knocked on my front door and said, “Please, I can’t possibly perform without your presence.” I was invited as a guest of Activision.

Tony Hawk is pretty passionate about making skate parks available to kids everywhere. He talked about using his influence to help build skate parks in neighborhoods where kids don’t have a place to play. It’s easy to want to contribute to his foundation, and I was thrilled to be at an event that built a skate park for kids in Long Beach. He talked about how the skate parks all closed down in the 80′s because of insurance costs, and that he was so bummed because he didn’t have a place to play. Which makes sense, because I remember kids skating in empty swimming pools, and in sewer pipes that were waiting to be installed. Kids skated everywhere.

But then kids started grinding on stairwells, and signs started popping up. NO SKATING. And suddenly skating was a crime.

Tony Hawk and Activision have a new game coming out in a few days. It’s called Tony Hawk Shred (TH Shred), and like TH Ride you can skate through all the places where no one wants you. I’m pretty sure that Shred is the only way I’ll be able to ride a skateboard around New Orleans, and I’m absolutely certain that it’s the only snowboarding I’ll ever do (I tried, snowboarding made me cry).

At this fabulous party I was lucky enough to try Shred. Basically it’s like Tony Hawk’s Ride but everything is bigger and better. The kids love it, and so do I. The only thing is that it does make noise. There’s a thump thump thumping that is only allowed after 9am in this house. On the good side, they work up a good sweat playing.

I didn’t get any pictures of myself or Jane trying out Shred, they were all super blurry, but I was able to snap a few of my friend Lolita’s boys. They had a blast.

Now, for the passive aggressive part of the post. I asked the folks at Activision if they would want to do a giveaway for the game. And they said, “no”… which I think we all know means “maybe”. Right? I’m pretty committed to pestering them endlessly until they agree that giving one of y’all a copy of this game would be the smartest PR move ever. Clearly when people want to know about good PR they ask me. Right?

Right.

The game goes on sale October 26, and it’s an awful lot of fun.

When Tony Hawk invites you to Ron Burkle’s house for a little skating demo and Jane’s Addiction.

Perry Farrell was charming as ever

Tony Skated for everyone

And I’ll be posting about the whole experience another time, hopefully I’ll find a way to get at least one reader one of Tony Hawk’s new games.

It was just fun. Lots and lots of fun.