I Forgot the Safe Word

  Black Eye, Day Six   Thanks to G+ I have the best response ever. When someone asks me what happened to my eye I simply reply, “I forgot the safe word.” Last night it was met with immediate laughter from two girlfriends and confusion from a third. That third girlfriend really isn’t all that sweet, she’d just had more to drink. She got it after a while. Another friend is in some pretty serious trouble. Actually she’s not a friend. She lied to me for a number of years. …

I Need a Good Story for this One

Friday afternoon I had a little kitchen accident. I won’t bore you with the details because there isn’t a chance in the world that one of the details would make me look smart or competent. This was day three, and I assure you that day four is no better. When you walk around town with a black eye everyone asks how it happens. I’ve found that looking people dead in the eye, shrugging and saying “bar brawl” unnerves them. They all look at you in disbelief and say, “Really?” I …