Friday Confession: Hunting The Free Range Hamster

I have an ongoing hamster issue. This time last year our son, Alexander, was given a hamster for his seventh birthday. Said hamster escaped again several months ago, and after many weeks of hamster stalking we threw in the towel and got a new hamster for Alexander. If you are a friend of mine on facebook you may have seen some of my recent updates, they look like this: Be vewy vewy quiet, I’m hunting hamsters. I found a little stash of dog food in the kitchen last week, so …

Friday Confession: I Lied And I’d Do It Again

I lied to a group of people for a prolonged period of time. I knew I was lying, many of them knew I was lying, and I would do it again. It was the right thing to do. I am a liar. In December of 2006 my friends and I told the hospital staff that I was the AIDS patient’s sister. We did so because his partner of 14 years had no legal rights without waving a sheet of paper in front of their faces every time he opened his …

Friday Confession: I Am Pavlov’s Dog

I exercise a lot. It’s not for the reasons you might imagine. I play doubles tennis just to have fun and move my body, but I play singles for one reason and one reason only. Eggrolls. I love fried food. I love it so much that I was 198 pounds when I was pregnant with the kids. I have the palate of a morbidly obese woman, so I exercise. With two hours of activity I reward myself with two eggrolls. I don’t really want to play a singles match, I’d …

Friday Confession: More Lawlessness

I drive in the carpool lane with great regularity. Most often it is because I am so unaccustomed to being alone in the car that I forget and slip into the diamond lane. At other times it’s simply a calculated risk. I got caught once, but the car seats in the back convinced the CHP that it was the former and not the latter. He too, had wee ones, and let me go with a warning. I am thinking of putting a booster seat in the back, so I can …