We Brought Static Back From NYC


We got back from New York City on New Year’s Eve. Yes, that was three days ago, and I’m just finishing the laundry.

The first load was fine, and then when I went to transfer the second load from washer to dryer all I could hear was the zing of static electricity. I’d recently decided to try Method laundry soap and softener (I thought it would be nice to have lighter bottles to lift), so I figured that it just wasn’t doing the job that my beloved Tide and Downey could do.

I ran to the market on New Year’s Day to grab bottles of Tide and Downey, rewashed the clothes with all the proper pollutants in place…

Went to put them in the dryer, and there was snapping and zinging once again.

I think New York City is the static-iest place on earth, and I have no clue how to get my clothes presentable.

Kenmore Elite Review and Sweepstakes


I didn’t know I could like laundry until I tried a Kenmore Elite. Obviously I still hate the parts of laundry that we all hate, the folding, and the putting it away. But I want to show you what happens when you turn on Kenmore Elite Dryer.

Every time I turn the dryer off and on, I smile. It makes me think of the Jetsons, and that I’m living in some sort of super shiny space age house. I’m not, I’m living in Los Angeles, but please let me have a fantasy while I’m doing laundry.

Here’s the bottom line. The folks at Kenmore were incredibly generous and they’re letting me test out an Elite Washer and Dryer set for a few weeks. When they first approached me I was excited for a number of reasons. I was also a bit unenthusiastic, because I have a washer and dryer. They wanted me to review their washer and dryer when there was absolutely nothing wrong with the washer and dryer that I already owned.

Or so I thought.

Everyone knows that I love things clean. My kids know, my husband knows, my readers know, the other moms at little league know that I love clean clothing, and I’m not afraid to pull out the big guns to get it there. Well, I don’t really need the big guns anymore.

When I did the first few loads of laundry I noticed that my clothes were different. My whites were whiter, so I stopped using the laundry boosters. My whites were still whiter. What I never expected to have happen is that my towels got a new life. My bath towels are not new, they were coarse and old, with the new washer and dryer I’m noticing that my bath towels are fluffy and absorbent again. I don’t know if I can attribute this to the washer or to the dryer. I know that a full load of jeans is dry within 25 minutes. That is amazing. My old washer and dryer would have taken an hour after I’d hung the clothes out in the sun for a preliminary drying.

I used to unplug my washer and dryer after my chores were done. The older models use electricity even when they are shut off. The Kenmore Elite Washer and Dryer does not. I love that. I love it from an economical point of view, and also because it’s how appliances should be.

Someone was asking me about mildew and black mold. Right on the front of the washer is a sensor that lights up when it’s time to clean your washer. All front loading washers need to be cleaned now and again. Also, I’m told that because front loading washers have to have a very tight seal, you don’t want to be leaving wet clothes in them for extended periods of time (like days folks, not hours).

If you love the web, you’ll love this set. I know, weird right? Wrong. Take a look at all these buttons! Buttons and lights and chimes. Really? What more could you want?

Kenmore Elite Clothing Washer

It’s very intuitive and it’s smart. After you put your clothes in, there are a few little fake spins (did I mention it wiggles in different directions?) and I guess it must weigh things, because after that the little laundry cup gives you one, two or three bars. Accordingly, you add a small, medium or larger amount of laundry detergent to your machine. I suspect, though I’m not sure, that this feature is one of the reasons my clothes seem cleaner. Less residue if you’re using the right amount of detergent?

I know that my friends at Sears don’t want to hear this, but the Kenmore Elite Washer and dryer is Home Economics for geeks. The washer moves in a million different directions, or seven… I can’t recall which. There is no vampire electrical use, it weighs your clothes and it greets you, and I smile like Pavlov’s dog because it reminds of the startup sound of a 14k modem.

Mostly though, my clothes are cleaner and my gas bill has dropped significantly. I’m happy, and you can be too.

This set is not inexpensive, but the way I see it, you extend the life of your clothes and drop your power bills. The set is near $2,500 and I think it’s worth every cent.

Tomorrow I’ll upload a video about all the features of the Kenmore Elite washer and dryer, but in the interim I want you to know that you can win them. Go to KenmoreEliteSweeps.com and enter to win your own set. I promise you, you’re going to love it. This isn’t just another washer and dryer.

*This post is part of a relationship I have with Kenmore. The relationship will never influence the content.

Mother Earth Can Kiss My Ass: Integrity Blows


For those of you unfamiliar with Little League, the season is over. We are now involved in what is known as “Fall Ball”. I don’t typically say “we” when it comes to children’s sports, but I assure you “we” are involved in fall ball. The kids play for a couple of hours each Sunday and the parents cheer and take stunning pictures of their little boys. Why? Because little boys in team uniforms are absolutely adorable, squishable and oooohhh yummy.


You are the only mother there whose child has dingy white pants because every part of your heart and soul knows that bleach is about vanity and kicks the crap out of Mother Earth. Then the PMS kicks in… so I’m fighting back tears standing in the aisles of the grocery story and I called Lolita, “Alexander’s pants are brown, my son slides into every base and I don’t know what to do.” She hemmed and hawed, and said, “I use Tide, but I know you like things to be eco friendly…” and while she was still talking, I was tossing Tide into my grocery cart. You see, I know Lolita and she has two boys and they have sparkly clothes, so I was in.

This is how the pants started out:

I tried used Tide and ended up with this

Naturally the first questions were, “did Tide pay you to say that?” and “did they send you samples?”

Answers: No, Tide did not pay me to do anything. No, they did not send me a sample.

Blanket Answer: When I get samples of products they typically end up at The Interfaith Food Pantry.

I know those are just iPhone pictures, but trust me, I went to Little League with my camera and my son, and I sat in the bleachers with the best feeling any mother could ever have. The feeling of knowing that I’m a better housewife than you are.  My kid had an amazing play in the outfield, but by then his pants were stained again, so I wasn’t feeling quite as perky. Offhandedly I mentioned to Jane that I was happy about Alexander’s pants being so white, and the Tide had worked well and she interrupted me with:

Mo-om that is the worst thing you could do for the planet. Tide takes fifteen years to go back into the ground. I told you go to Gelsons and get the stuff that’s good for the planet.

My daughter is furious, and with one swipe she takes the wind out of my clean-pants-glory filled sails.

I do exactly what any self respecting Mommy Blogger worth her salt would do in the same situation. I called Tide’s PR folks. [shut up and stop laughing] I happen to know that there are more than a few Moms on the Tide account and that they would know how to talk to my daughter. An incredibly sensitive email was sent to my daughter, who was delighted, that included some simple facts about Tide being phosphate free and concentrated. There was mention made of their cold water wash, and it was just the perfect letter for a ten year old. I was so hopeful, and when I logged onto her email account (yes I read my children’s emails and I recommend you do too) here’s the reply I saw:

Thank you for sending me that email but I have heard that it takes 15 years
for Tide to go it to the ground and… Well yeah.

In case you are worried about me, I’ve found the perfect solution. I’m hiding all the laundry soap from my kid. Mother Earth can suckit, I like sparkling white clothes.

Oh and also, we won’t be going to Rock A Little Feed A Lot, because even though my family would have loved seeing Sheryl Crow perform live, I don’t think that giving America Frankenfood solves the hunger issue. It does however, explain why our children are morbidly obese.