At MomsLA

12.1.11

I wrote about how the web hates Mommy Bloggers.

I’ve got a fun lunch today and later this evening I’m doing something with Nick Cannon, Ingrid Hoffmann and SKYY Vodka.

I don’t know who Nick Cannon is but my 13 year old “has heard the name”. I don’t know who Ingrid Hoffman is but I like anyone who smiles and holds a cocktail.

I’m very clear on why SKYY Vodka is, which is why I’m ditching the fireside chat with Michael Arrington to go hang out in Hollywood. If anyone wants my ticket for tonight let me know.

Nick CannonIngrid Hoffman from the Food Netwok

Conflicted About Blogging

06.28.11

In a few weeks I’ll be joining 3,000 or so women at BlogHer. It’s a big blogging conference for women and I’d went once before when it was in Chicago.

I have mixed feelings about it. Although I’m not part of the BlogHer ad network, and I don’t participate in their community BlogHer has paved a path for women to follow. BlogHer took a hobby and turned it into a career. For that I am grateful.

But of course I’m not one to gush, so I have to find the negative too.

As bloggers we have to support ourselves with brand partnerships, advertising or by writing on someone else’s site for a paycheck (just not places like Huff Po who pay you with a thank you note). There’s a delicate balance, and I’m not sure that many people achieve it. I occasionally share product information here and it comes from one of three ways.

  1. A product has blown me away and I’ve told you about it. (like the Diva Cup)
  2. A product line has dazzled me and I’ve begged them to partner with me (like Kenmore)
  3. A brand has a message that they’ve shared with me and I’ve agreed that the message has value and shared it with you. (P&G)

The way that a product would make it’s way to me is pretty narrow, and the way that I’d share it with y’all is narrower still. Not a lot of product sharing goes on here. Which is good, right?

There’s a new kind of blogger, the review blogger. Review bloggers seem to be mostly women, but that’s just the way I see things because I’m smack dab in the middle of the mommy blogging world. I want to dislike the review blogger. You see she takes any old crap and writes glowing reviews of it. Typically the review blogger only writes positive reviews and she might even publish a press release word for word.

The review blogger is the lazy publicist’s best friend. The review blogger will almost always garner positive press for a product and almost never charge anything more than the cost of the trinket and overnight shipping.

The review blogger has also sucked the life out of the blogosphere. The review blogger often calls herself a Mom Blogger (or worse a Mommy Blogger) and her site can create confusion. You see when I tell people that I’m a Mom Blogger they’re like, “But you’re so much MORE than that.” And I smile but don’t say anything because calling your peers crap makes you only better than crap. In my head I’m screeching, “They aren’t bloggers! They’re shills.”

And I’m sure I’m going to meet a huge number of them in August. And I’m conflicted because these are nice women who I like. They’re walking down this same weird path of blogging, but they’re using it very differently.

Is it okay to like someone and really dislike their business?

 

How Much Money Do Mommy Bloggers Make? Tech Talk Tuesday

11.17.09

Last night there was a ridiculous fascinating discussion on twitter about how much Mommy Bloggers make.

Well, if you want to sponsor a post my rates are public over at Social Spark. Note, that I’ve taken exactly one sponsored post with them thus far, why? Because even with cash being flung my way, I’ve got to believe in the business. I’m mostly a business atheist.

Kelby Carr believes that Mom Bloggers deserve to get paid. I mostly agree with Kelby. Kelby and Gwen Bell then went on to have a twitter discussion about how much money Mom Bloggers make. One mom went so far as to create a poll. I won’t link you to the poll. Instead I will point you to ten of the much less personal questions that Mommy Bloggers answer each and every day.

1. Bikini waxes hurt more after childbirth. Don’t ask me why, just know that the inbetween is ouch.

2. You might poop when you’re pushing the baby out. Really, on the birth table, in front of your husband. That a father goes anywhere near a vagina is a testament to the power of man’s innate need to procreate.

3. Sometimes romance turns into a vagina on fire. Well, not fire, but uncomfortably hot (bad), which should not be confused with hawt (which is good)

4. We lament the bodies we used to have.

5. We assert that men can love us and beat us. It is always true, because it is always our perception.

6. Our asses bleed and we tell you.

7. We share our adoption stories, even when it shows a family’s frailties.

8. We do before and after Botox pictures, and we don’t deny the Botox (take that Brangelina! both of you)

9. We overdose at 7 months pregnant, and tell you.

10. We announce on the Oprah Winfrey show that we aren’t having sex. Really.

If that isn’t revealing enough for you then nothing ever will be. After you show me your husband’s pay stub, I’ll be sure to show you mine.

What’s a Mommy Blogger worth? What’s a copywriter worth, or an associate producer? Show me yours and I’ll show you mine. Nah. Nevermind.

Mommy Blogging from Virgin Airlines @35,000 Feet

06.19.09

There are bruises on my shin because the six year old next to me  fidgets and squirms. I don’t care at all, I miss my own two so much I can no longer be kind to adults. I need to get back to my kids.

I can’t stop thinking about the 140 Conference. I took so much great stuff away from it, but it’s not what you’d expect. Yes, I was in a room with all the stars of Social Media. Yes, I was on a panel with two remarkable women. No, the folks on stage did not dazzle me. The folks who dazzled me were the attendees. They were bright and eager, polite mostly*, and had more to add to the conversation than I ever could have hoped for. 

I met photographers and Moms, start ups in tech, fashion and automotive, and a whole bunch of developers. I was treated to a cocktail at the Roger Smith Hotel and everyone asked the same question.

What do you do?

I’m a Mommy Blogger.

And then they look confused, like I’m supposed to talk about leaky nipples or potty training. At times I oblige. I started a conversation with Jack Dorsey with, “My daughter is so cool that….” and, to his credit, his eyes did not roll up in his head as he feigned interest in my OhMyGawdYouAreMyRockStar rambling. Please Jack, don’t worry, I bore myself.

Sadly I also said, “you look so young, I could burp you.” Yes, I did. For the record, Jack is 32, full of grace and likely has a snapshot of me in his pocket so that he can remember whom to avoid at the next gathering.

Back to the Mommy Blogging. It is not an offensive term. It is not a demeaning term. There is no part of me that wants to be anything more than a wife and a mother. The add on things that I do, like blogging, are because I am a wife and a mother. 

What makes me shudder is when women say ,”I’m not just a mom.” 

Well, of course you aren’t. If you’re a Mom writing about motherhood, you are a mommy blogger. I cannot comprehend where the shame is in that. 

_________

*One guy got up from his seat and handed me his camera, he said, “I’ve got to take a conference call, can you take a picture of each slide?” Obviously, I said no. I’m still wondering who the self important asshat is.

Also, thanks so much to LaLaWag for the interview. You’ve always been a great resource for me, I’m just tickled pink to be there.