Eff You Lady: Adventures in Head Lice
Dear Myla’s Mother,
Fuck you.
I could end the letter there but I won’t. I’d like to elaborate on why you can go fuck yourself.
This house has been head lice free for almost a month. Why? Because when my daughter had them I took care of her. We stayed home for a few days to get the job done.
When your daughter had head lice you sent her to camp. How do I know this? Because my daughter told me so. Myla explained to the girls that she only had a few left.
Not. Okay.
So, Myla’s Mommy, I’d really like to let you know that I’m over you. I’ve never met you in person, and your daughter (by all accounts) is lovely. But you are on my shit list.
This time I’m using the Robi Comb. My aunt is a school nurse and recommended it.
xoxo
Jessica