You may recall that Jane recently requested an SUV or a crossover for her first vehicle. I’m open to this. What I never mentioned is that my mom has been making noises about buying herself a new car. She has a 2006 Lexus RS400h that lives in a garage, visits only the Lexus dealer and has less than 40,000 miles on it. As much as I love some of the new vehicles out there I want that car. Did I mention that it’s fully loaded? Mom had a checkup recently …
Solo Parenting Day 3
The house is now as dirty as my hair. I’ve sharpened my knives because Alexander requires endless amounts of fruit. He has a sweet tooth and just today ate a pint of strawberries, a pint of blueberries, half a small watermelon and then all his regular food. He just sort of sits down and inhales it all watching quizzically as I slice my hand open. I’ve decided that my cut hand is my son’s fault because I still can’t sleep. In addition to missing Mr. G I have Junior the …
Oh Your Mother Never Ripped Her Bra Off at the Dinner Table? You’re So Fancy
Jane used to love soccer. These days Jane likes soccer. I think after having experienced volleyball she’s decided that it’s a lot of fun to play a sport where people don’t knock you over, pull your hair, whisper “bitch” in your ear and slidetackle you arbitrarily. She was going to try out for the soccer team but it became clear to her that she wouldn’t get a lot of play time (she’s a Freshman and there’s only one team – it’s Varsity) if she made the team. She had convinced …
This Was Actually Alexander’s Idea
And I’ve effectively thrown both my children under the bus. I do hope there’s a therapist who waits under busses for children.
Pre High School Conversations
ME: It’s time for you to drive. This is bullshit. JANE: [grinning] What kind of car are you going to buy me? ME: I’m sorry for cussing ME & JANE [in chorus]: Cussing doesn’t count in bad traffic. ME: I don’t know. We want you in something safe. JANE: Jerry said he’s never cut a dead body out of a BMW or a Mercedes. [Jerry is our firefighter neighbor] ME: That’s a very real possibility but it won’t be anywhere near new. JANE: [smiling and nodding] I know And then …