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Rest Assured I Made Sure The Danes Can Hate America

This morning I was talking to a group of Danish Journalists and I did a great job of making them feel superior. First off I wore a dark brown belt that was frayed along with a shirt that was too pink and too tight. I’d hoped that my jacket would cover the belly fat, but according to Sadistic Sandy (the personal trainer who I will introduce y’all to later) belly fat means that you’re eating too much, not that you’re dressing wrong.

Denmark is supposed to be the happiest country in the world. From this group I’d suspect that’s accurate. Everyone was tall thin, impossibly fashionable, blue eyed and smiley. I’d be happy hanging out with them all day.

Essentially I was there to give them a run down on what Mom Blogging looks like. I gave them an overview of the landscape, and a quick run down of how I started blogging. After a while we got our rhythm and I showed them some of the work I’ve done with Momversation. Naturally the first video on the page is all about Pre School Panic. There was no sound so I had to tell them about how a New York City mom was suing her daughter’s preschool for the $19,000 tuition because she didn’t feel like her daughter had been academically prepared for the right schools.

They snickered.

And then I stood there and I thought about the fact that Americans will pay a year’s salary for school and then turn around and sue. We sue for pretty much everything. I had to giggle too, but I also had to explain to them that New York is a very expensive place to live…. and then someone asked me where I fell in that discussion.

Well, I kind of understand… and then I realized that I sound ridiculous.

And then someone asked me about politics and where my blog might be on the spectrum and I explained to them that everyone hates me because I want marijuana legal and moms to raise their own kids. And then there was a groan from one of the women. So now I’m explaining to them that in America women don’t get a year of maternity leave, that it’s unusual for a man to take more than a few days off of work and that planning a family here requires planning because we don’t support families…. ¬†and oh how they turned on me.

But they were beautiful and they were happy and Denmark doesn’t have personal bloggers yet but I suspect that they will soon. I did my part. I made sure those journos know the facts. Americans like to sue people,Americans like to get involved with other people’s parenting, and Americans like pot, but not enough to make it legal.

I’m like an Ambassador.