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Chemo Effing Therapy

It was a long day with the doctor yesterday. Everything is okay, but it’s not good. Good being “remission”. My hands are swollen, my hips ache and I can’t walk well the first hour of the morning. Maybe that’s not actually okay?

I’m not a good patient. I am not good at taking pills… recreationally who isn’t but this whole thing of two pills on an empty stomach isn’t working very well. I never have an empty stomach and I don’t want to wait an hour for breakfast. But I try to wait that hour for breakfast because they tell me it will make me feel better. Then I have a pill that I take two of on even days and one on odds. I take that with food. The food part is easy. I am always eating. Of course there’s the monthly injection. Even though it doesn’t hurt much anymore it’s the most depressing part of it all. I hate that injection and I hate seeing the syringes in my refrigerator. I’ve considered buying a small refrigerator just so I don’t have to look at the medicine every time I eat (which as you might imagine is often).

My hands are still in bad shape. I’m going to see an acupuncturist tomorrow for some short term relief because I really need to avoid the prednisone and I’m tired of celebrex upsetting my stomach.

The doctor wants to add back methotrexate which I’ve taken before and not liked. With “not liked” being a massive understatement. Part of what worries me about methotrexate is the liver damage. I don’t want to live with RA but I can live with RA. You can’t live cirrhosis.

I’m not filling any prescriptions just yet. I’d really like to celebrate my birthday with a glass (bottle… jug???) of wine and travel without worrying about side effects.

Here’s hoping.