Things I Should Not Tell New/Expecting Parents

Things I should let parents discover on their own:

  • You love each child differently, but you don’t love one more than the other
  • Babies are resilient, and sometimes we drop them
  • Heads bleed a lot, if there is water involved it is even more dramatic
  • The sun will rise and set on you, until third grade, then they will realize you are not cool
  • Diapers leak, and not just urine escapes
  • Childbirth hurts, no amount of blowing hee into the air will take the pain away
  • Your breasts will never be the same again, this is not a good thing
  • It only gets more expensive

Every other part of it is really quite wonderful, but good grief I should have my jaw wired shut when talking to new parents.

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  1. Pingback: What should you tell expectant/new parents? | PhD in Parenting

  2. Every last word is the truth! And ditto Zoey-you’ve never showered until you’ve showered with a toddler holding the curtain open the whole time to watch you.

  3. @katie- we gave up the modesty right away and swapped out the shower curtain for a clear one when our baby was born. Made showering with a tiny infant easier for all of us, and will at least (hopefully?) save us from the problem you described (which must let all the steam out and make for a cold shower -yuck!).

  4. I couldn’t agree more, especially about childbirth. It’s really best if pregnant women NOT ask me what I really think about it! ;) I just prefer honesty over sugar coating. Seem so fake!

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  6. @Renee, we do the clear shower curtain too, and it works great. I don’t care if my three-year-old and 11-month-old watch me take a shower, but I’d rather if the little one didn’t SCREAM at me while I do it.

    I kind of wish someone had told me not to believe everything the pediatrician/AAP told me. But, probably, it’s not something I would dare to say to someone else.

  7. should i jump in with the list from parents of teens and college age. oh my. i think i will only give you one really good one.

    NEVER, under any circumstances, say the words, “my child will never _____ (fill in the blank”

    because at some point, in some form, they most probably will. and believe it or not you will survive it.

    btw, the bleeding advice was a good one.

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