DAD: So Morgan is telling me you write stuff I’m not supposed to read.

ME: No, you can totally read it, it’s just heavy on the V word

DAD: Huh?

ME: Vagina

STEPMOTHER: It’s not that bad, it’s like a personae she’s created (Yeah Jo, whatever you need to believe…)

DAD: [gulping wine with impunity] Have you read her blog? [he points to a sketch of a boat on the wall.... FYI Dad, you can totally leave that one to my Brother... I'm still after the Warhols]

ME: Whose?

DAD: Her! [he points as if I'm the slow child] She’s a performance artist.

ME: I don’t read blogs from performance artists unless I’m there to mock them.

I think we all realize that the mocking of performance artists is work easily accomplished.

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