Monthly Archives: March 2010

So, I was having lunch with a girlfriend today, and while I was waiting for the valet to bring my car, I noticed a billboard for a TV show I wanted to watch. There was, however a slight glitch, the TV show isn’t on until much later this month. Well, the show is on one of Mr. G’s affiliates. Always thinking quickly, I hopped into my car and dialed his office.

MR. G: Hi honey [he has caller id]

ME: Hi, can you do me a favor and bring home a screener.

MR. G: Sure, what for?

ME: For _____

MR. G: Why can’t you watch that on TV? You never watch DVDs

ME: Because it’s not showing until March 16th.

And then something happened, and it’s really worrisome. The phone went dead. I have no idea how Mr. G. expects to do business with phones that are constantly disconnecting.

Three bits of Netiquette you may have missed:

Comments: When you go to leave a comment on my blog (and most others) you’ll need to add your name, email and an optional URL. If you have a link to point people toward, this is the place for the URL. When you add a URL in the body of a comment it will trigger spam filters, and even if it slips through, it’s bad form. Also don’t use URL shorteners on someone else’s blog bit.ly j.mp and the like are best reserved for Twitter.

Twitter: when you send the same message to more than 2 people at a time people won’t be very interested in your twitter stream. Some folks may think you’re a spammer. I’ll just think you haven’t learned yet. You will. It’ll be okay.

Texting: the first time you send someone a text, it’s nice to say “this is Jessica and …. ” because they might not have you in their phone book, and it’s really embarrassing to take a lovely text and ask, “who is this?” Making people comfortable around you is always in style.

Observations around tech

Tech communities are amazing. I’m very new to the tech scene in Los Angeles, which is thriving. I could be out every night of the week, and surrounded by friends. I love the inclusiveness of LA Tech, and I think I understand why.

Go onto facebook and find the kids you went to elementary school with. If they were short and fat, super smart but also impish and charming, there’s a pretty good chance they’re living in Silicon Valley and driving a Tesla.That short fat kids’ best friend is tall and skinny to the point of gawky, possibly cannot make eye contact, but definitely can play Dungeons and Dragons and possibly belongs to role playing message boards. That best friend is also rich, and in tech.

So, what happens when the awkward smart kids, who may have been bullied are the ones in charge? In my experience, they create cultures of inclusiveness. When I walk into a tech event, I stand at the door, feel my anxiety fall off of me, take a deep breath and realize these are my people. We’re all a little weird, but we stopped fighting it. None of us ever belonged, so we stopped trying to belong. Everyone is smarter than I am, so I know I’ll learn something, and I can just be me.

Tech events are inclusive for many reasons, but probably because it’s a group of individuals who spent a lot of their lives being excluded. The nature of web work is that it’s never perfected, you need your friends to show you the bugs. It’s so much more fun when a friend finds it then when a frenemy does.

Tech is good. I love my family, I love my real life interactions with friends and neighbors, but really? I love my Nexus 1 and my iPhone, and when I’m with my friends in tech, no one asks me why I need to have two cellphones. Y’all get it. My family still thinks I’m weird.

I see the world a little differently. I’m quirky and weird, and I’m okay with that. I’m just grateful that I’ve found a place where my quirkiness can both flourish, and blend in a little.

I know you really hate it when I talk about you here on this blog, but I’m thinking that every daughter in North America could say the same thing and it’d be cool.

You taught me some stuff that’s come in handy. I know how to operate most power tools, tie a lure, and shoot a pistol. I can also chart a stock the old fashioned way and run a mile in a decent amount of time.

Mostly Dad, you told me to never drink cheap champagne. So as I stand here with your Granddaughter who is eating fresh fruit, tofu corn dogs, and most of my caviar, I think she got it from you Dad.

So thanks. I think. And can I borrow some money? Because feeding Jane is kinda expensive.

Things with Alexander are better, we had a bit of a blowout and I yelled at him. He didn’t yell back, which is good. It’s not good that I yelled at him, because I hate being the yelling mom, but I absolutely refuse to be the mom of the kid who doesn’t listen. He’s a good little boy, he’s testing the limits, and we’re providing them. I try to take cues from my husband who is so thoughtful. Before the kids turn on the PlayStation he asks them, “how much time do you think you need?” and then he sets the timer. I’ve just been setting the timer. Adding the step that empowers them has been helpful. When they were littler I used to remember that, now I fear we’re all running at so fast a pace that I’m forgetting the details of being their mother.

Krista came over and we sipped wine in the middle of the day (4pm), half a dozen (or more) kids ran in and out of the house, and I installed my new ceiling light. Our girls have been friends since diapers, and Krista remembers Alexander’s birth. There’s magic when the kids get together, I love it.

My friend Tanis was told by a PR rep at Blissdom that she’s too edgy, feral even to work with publicists. If Tanis was a better listener she would know that girls like us shouldn’t cross the Mason-Dixon line. Oh, but Tanis is Canadian, so she might not have known that. I mean, how could she possibly know? She’s busy decorating her Ivory Tower as she has won the 2010 Bloggies at THE BEST CANADIAN BLOGGER. Conversations like that just reaffirm for me that the best Bloggers has little to no use for Publicists. Mommy Hawkers (review only bloggers) are probably the best match for the fake Louboutin PR crowd that dominates in the blogosphere.

I went to the gym this morning to get on the elliptical. Well, actually I go to the gym to watch TV. It’s lame, I know. A run would do me more good than an hour on the elliptical, but sometimes I just want to watch TV. Of course I couldn’t because all the TV plugs don’t work at the gym. I should stop blogging and tell them, because I care about that. After my workout I passed by a smoothie chain and I thought I’d pop in and get one. In the store were two women and myself. One was at the cash register and one was behind her, coughing, a lot. In fact, she was coughing into her hand. After I decided on on one of four smoothies that weren’t comprised mostly of sherbet (which makes them into milkshakes), I handed the cashier my $4.35 and watched the coughing one begin to make the smoothie with neither a hand washing nor a set of gloves. I told her I changed my mind, and that I’d like my money back please. Unlike the gym, smoothies aren’t a big part of my life. I’m not going to complain to a manager (I’m pretty sure one of them was the manager) because I don’t care. I’ll be perfectly content to skip the smoothies altogether, as I probably have 3 a year. The opposite of love is not hate, the opposite of love is indifference. As I walked out of the store I heard the two girls talking about the “crazy lady”, um… I’d get bugged about that, but again, they’re coughing in a smoothie shop all day.

I’m playing with YouTube more and more. I’d love it if you subscribed. I promise no super long videos. Double dog swear. I have a terrible case of YouTuberculosis and I blame Ben Hughes. It’s highly contagious and clicking here just might transmit it.

Kenmore has provided me a Washer and Dryer to review. They arrived on Friday, and I ran out to get HE laundry soap so I could get started. While I was at the grocery store I started sniffing the laundry detergents, because I wasn’t sure what sort of flowers my husband should smell like. Well, I got distracted and came home with regular laundry soap. Although some people might think it’s a crummy way to start, I thought that a mountain of laundry suds was kind of funny. I’ve since bought the HE soap and I’m deeply ashamed that our clothes have been dirty this long.

I’m turning 40 this month. My husband is asking me what I want for my birthday. Nothing. Really. I do have it all, and the things I don’t have I never really wanted. He’s asking if I want a party? Nope, nothing sounds less appealing than playing hostess on my birthday. What about a small one? Oh good, then I can’t even get lost in a crowd. Maybe I want to take a trip? Well, I’d love to ski, but I’m not into spending the money. I looked around for ski trips, and found the Snowmamas, which raises more questions than answers. Do I trust any of those reviews? I went on over to Skidazzle (which is a group I’ve always trusted) and I’m wondering, do I want to review my family vacation for you? Why should I? Why shouldn’t I? Again, I’m struggling with privacy and authenticity. Every time I show up in a group of Mom Bloggers (which is less and less often) I hear the same refrain, “If I don’t have anything nice to say, I won’t write a review.” Really? How is that helpful? And how the hell did I go from turning 40 to (once again) noting that too many people can be bought and paid for? In some circles Yelp is no better.

The book is killing me. I’m writing like crazy, but I don’t think I’ll be done by the time I’m 40. This is depressing. Everything about it is depressing. I mean, if I put the kids in daycare I could be done in four weeks, but really? Why? I’d rather play with my kids, which is not what a publisher wants to hear…