Overheard: But You Don’t Want to Sleep With Me

Last Sunday night I went to a screening of Burlesque with my friend Heather. It was a charity event that benefited Project Angel Food, and it’s quite possible that Heather and I were two of the only straight people in the theater.

I wasn’t particularly dressed up, good jeans and a cashmere sweater. I wasn’t wearing any makeup, but I felt good.

When I saw Heather she, of course, looked amazing, and she told me I looked good too. It’s what girlfriends do.

After the movie Heather ran into the ladies room and I sat on the benches outside waiting for her. A nice lady sat down next to me and started talking to me about my boots, and then she complimented my hair, and then she asked me who I came here with and then I realized she was hitting on me.

And then I felt pretty.

Because I’m shallow.

I was giggling with Heather, “Oh my gawd I think a lesbian was hitting on me.” and because I’m shallow I added, “do you think it’s because my boots are not super feminine or because I’m having a good hair day.”

“You look beautiful. I told you that when I saw you tonight.” Heather said, “Why don’t you listen to me?”

“Because you don’t want to sleep with me, so it doesn’t count.”

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4 Comments

  1. Hilarious! I’m shallow too and loved to be hit on (who doesn’t?) – man, woman, who cares – it’s a great ego boost. And yes, we must listen to our friends when they tell us that we look beautiful (even though it’s their job to do so)!

  2. OMG, that is hilarious.

  3. Pam

    I’ve always said a compliment from a lesbian is the highest form of a compliment. Women are not nice as a gender – certainly not to each other. So forget what a man has to say – if a CHICK thinks you’re hott, you ARE.

  4. I love the way you told this story.

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