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I’ll Take that Exam With a Side of Irony Please

Last night my son and I watched CNN as the US Government went into a partial shutdown. He looked worried that there would be mayhem on the streets so I reassured him by explaining that our Police and Fire Departments are funded with local money and it wouldn’t particularly affect him. I went on to explain that the kids who would be affected most would be the ones whose parents work for the federal government, they won’t be working.

I explained to him that there was an impasse with our budget and that Obamacare was a central point of contention. My boy’s exact words were, “I can’t believe that because they don’t want to give health insurance to homeless people they’ll stop paying the army.” He then walked away from the TV in disgust.

There was nothing I could do or say to make him less angry so we read some comic books side by side & called it a night. This morning we listened to NPR together. Jane didn’t give a shit, she’s got three homecoming dances in October. Skype and TopShop.com were taking all her concentration. I’m pretty sure her needs will be met shutdown or not.

This morning as the government shut down and the insurance exchange came alive I sat with physician to have my annual exam. Because we’ve opted into a concierge practice I had 90 minutes to talk about heart health (I’ve got a 1% chance of a heart attack or stroke in the next 10 years), lung health, cancer, my immune system and nutrition. It’s no secret that I adore my doctor both personally and professionally and he reassured me that we’d get my thyroid under control and that my cholesterol is fine, great even and I should keep enjoying my cheese and maintain a sugar free diet. He told me about five different times that sugar and processed foods need to be out of my diet as well as my children’s diets. We talked about the import of sex, rest and balance and we read through the results of a gazillion tests that I’d been given the week before.

I am lucky in that I have good insurance, great even, but in addition to the insurance Mr. G and I joined a concierge practice. My doctor has limited his practice to 500 patients (that’s still a lot) and we get a fairly detailed physical each year. We have a few other perks, like quick access to the doctor.

You see last Thursday Mr. G was in New York and leaving on a 6pm flight to Milan. At noon he knew that he was sick, really sick and we were able to get him on the phone with the doctor at a moment’s notice, have a prescription emailed and filled and then a courier delivered it to him with an hour to spare. Finding an English speaking physician on a weekend in Italy would not have been so easy.

You know what else is interesting? Breaking Bad. Breaking Bad just ended and for the three people who didn’t watch any of the show it’s about a mild mannered (schlubby even) science teacher who is diagnosed with cancer and needs hundreds of thousands of dollars to pay for his treatments so he manufactures meth. Breaking Bad could only take place in America.

breaking bad canada

Also, I hate breast cancer awareness. I hate every part of it. Go read this and tell a friend.

2 thoughts on “I’ll Take that Exam With a Side of Irony Please”

  1. I tend to agree with you on Breast Cancer Awareness Month…we are aware but it is about prevention which is the ultimate goal. I wish that people could discern between hype and help…you are right…everything with a Pink Ribbon on it does not mean it is good for you nor does it help in the prevention of breast cancer.
    A local well known restaurant in Chicago is advertising a dessert that if ordered will provide a donation to Breast Cancer….WTF? It is the same incongruity that we observe with Ronald McDonald Houses and McDonald’s advertising to children.
    Years ago…when I was young, telethons came under question because donations were being used to fill executive pockets…it seems not much has really changed…if we are duped into ordering a dessert in an upscale restaurant believing that we are helping the Breast Cancer Cause. What a joke…make your donations directly to research, get mammograms, live a “healthy lifestyle” and forget about looking for the pink ribbons to determine how you live in the month of October.

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