It’s 11pm and I’m finally getting around to posting something. I haven’t had time for much lately. We had Jane’s birthday and then Jane’s birthday party complete with her dad not singing and strumming a guitar.
We’ve celebrated my Mom and Stepfather’s Birthdays, we’ve taken ISEE’s and completed the first three high school applications for Alexander. Jane’s volleyball season and Alexander’s football seasons are wrapped up and we’re looking tennis and basketball square in the time consuming eye.
During all of this I’ve said yes to everything. I’ve said yes to every ride request, yes to every party and yes each morning that Alexander requested I bring him In N Out for lunch.
I’ve said yes because Jane is just weeks away from getting her driver’s license and I won’t have 45 minutes to be stuck in traffic with her anymore. I won’t get to hear about her day in the quiet warmth of the car. I’ve said yes because Alexander is months away from starting high school himself and the sting of the very longs days is still fresh. I know that I’ll miss him. I flirted with terrible sadness when Jane started high school. The days are just too long.
I’ve said yes to everything my kids have asked me for because their requests are reasonable and every yes gives us time together; five minutes here, twenty minutes there. I’m spoiling my kids, indulging them with time. I can’t imagine a scenario where I’ll regret this.
When they were babies spending enormous blocks of time with them was the most natural thing in the world. Some days I needed them more than they needed me. We’re a blink away from no one needing much from me anymore so it’s yes to everything and my days are long and interrupted. I like to be asleep by 10 and certainly have little interest in blogging at 11 but tonight I said yes to my husband as well and was baking a pie at quarter of ten.
It feels good. Giving to my trio regenerates me and I’m not a selfless woman by nature. There’s just something magical about this family of mine. Maybe a little less blogging and a little more saying yes.