Gluten Free Junior

The kids are snacking on Goldfish and drop a few. I find myself standing in the kitchen screeching, “Don’t let the dog eat the Goldfish they have gluten.” Because, of course, Junior is now gluten free. Let the mocking begin. Junior was scratching. Not like a little but like OMG get that flea ridden beast out of here. I brought him to the groomer for flea dips and they assured me that there were no fleas. I kicked him out of my bed partly because I worried about infestation and …

The Bubba Keg

At last night’s soccer practice Junior was in cute overload mode. He was freshly fluffed and bouncing around the sidelines looking for love wherever he could find it. One of the moms on the team was sitting in her chair and put her hand down to pet him. Junior bounced over to her and we compared notes. We both have poodles. Aren’t they smart. Well yes they are. And easy to train. My goodness Junior was trained in a day. They don’t bark. We nodded at each other knowingly because …

Junior and the Doggy Dentist

A few months ago Junior started licking everything. He licked the air, your hands, your clothing, my bed linens, everything. I thought it might have been behavioral as the latest addition to our family is not a lover of dogs. A few weeks ago I noticed that in addition to licking Junior had bad breath. He didn’t have typical dog breath, but he had the sort of breath where you longed for a good whiff of his ass because his ass would smell so much better. So I brought Junior to the …

Off Kilter

I didn’t bring my kids to school this morning, I didn’t even make sure they brushed their teeth after breakfast. I didn’t even make them breakfast, they had cereal. Mr. G loosely supervised the morning routine and our carpool brought them to school this morning while I brought Junior in for a little dental work. Since Junior is such a tiny dog they cannot clean his teeth without sedating him. If they apply pressure to his tiny little front teeth and he resists there is a great danger of the …